Obscure in Exile
by RoriDelilah
Summary: He didn't want to leave her, but he had no other choice. She didn't want him to go. The story of the fallout of young love and a dangerous world.


**Disclaimer: ** Unfortunately, nothing related to HP belongs to me. Text in italics are lyrics from the song "Pleads and Postcards" by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. Those do not belong to me either. Thinking upon what actually belongs to me is actually quite depressing…

"No, don't go!" she yelled frantically. He stopped for a second, but he refused to look back at her. He knew that if he did, then he would lose his resolve, and he couldn't afford for that to happen. He knew that what he was doing was the right thing for her. But if it was the right thing, why did it feel so wrong? He needed to leave, she deserved a better life than what he could give. She deserved a better person than he was capable of being. And he had to do whatever it would take to make the world a better place for her, even though he knew he might not live to see that better place.

_Sometimes I feel like I would die without you_

_And if it's too early, don't worry when I say I'm sorry now._

She took his hesitation as her chance to stop him from leaving her. She knew that his mind was a dark and complicated place, but she didn't care. She only cared about the fact that she loved him. She loved him for everything that he was, all of his imperfections; his completely fucked up and twisted emotions, the darkness that lived within him. She grabbed him and spun him around to look at her. His eyes were filled with a deep sadness, a sadness that she had never seen before, and she had spent hours looking into those eyes. She grabbed him and her lips crashed into his, trying to convey just how she felt about him because she knew words would fail her.

_Hang on to this moment_

_It will be all over soon._

After a few moments, he broke away from her. He didn't want to leave her, he didn't want to cause more sadness in her life. She had already experienced so much sadness and loss, and he hated that he was going to compound that. But it was the only way. He gazed into her eyes, seeing the devastation she was feeling, and the longer he looked into those beautiful eyes, the weaker his resolve was becoming. He looked away sharply. "No. I have to go. I have to do what's best for you," he said. The instant those words escaped his lips he regretted it. But he couldn't take the words back, and he saw how stricken she was by what he had said. She just looked at him, trying to figure out what to say. Her whole life, people had been telling her what was best for her. And she was tired of it. "No!" she yelled. "No, you leaving is not what's going to be best for me. I need you!"

_Sometimes it's hard, but I will help you understand it somehow_

_The only thing that I want from you is trust_

_Together we will make it through this world, we must._

He wanted nothing more than to stay with her. They had been together through so many things, but it wasn't the life that she deserved. Constantly running, constantly hiding, it wasn't what he wanted for her. And unless he walked out that door, she was trapped. He knew that he was playing with fire. He knew that there was a very distinct possibility that he was going to sacrifice his life in order to better hers, an act that he had never foreseen himself doing. But he knew that if he was gone, the danger would follow him and that she could finally be safe. She had followed him willingly, although nobody else would believe that. He knew that she would be safe and cared for, even though he couldn't be with her. While they had been keeping a low profile and staying well hid, circumstances had changed. Things were getting more and more dangerous, further and further complicated. And when he learned just how drastically the circumstances had changed, he knew that they couldn't go on in the way that they had. But he held a small glimmer of hope that he would make his way back to her someday.

_Yes, I know you'll wait for me_

_You'll wait for me till I get home_

She refused to let him go, still holding on to him for dear life, hoping against hope that if she just kept holding him that he would change his mind. "Please, please don't do this, please don't leave me," she begged. She had to make him understand that she couldn't go on without him. He was everything, without him life lost its meaning. She knew why he wanted to go, she knew why he wanted her to go back to where they came from. It wasn't something that had been planned, the law of unintended consequences in its most extreme form. She knew she was being selfish, she knew that she had to think rationally. But even though she knew this, it was not in her to be rational. She was never a rational person, she was fiery and passionate, and anyone who ever knew her would tell you that she would act first and think later. He was so opposite of that. He was passionate in his own way, but was extremely logical and rational, calculating all possibilities before taking action. She knew that this was not a decision he had made lightly, but she had to convince him to stay.

_This could be the last time that I speak with you_

_So just in case, let's make the best of what we have until it's through_

She looked so broken, so defeated. This hurt him more than anything. She had always had so much life, such determination, such spirit, and it looked as though it was just gone. Like she was a shell of the person that she was. He held her close to him, knowing that it could be the last time that he ever saw her, the person who he never expected to care for, the only person he had ever truly loved. She was the only person who ever got to glimpse the person he really was, the person who was behind all of the shields and barriers he had built around himself. She was the only person who loved him for who he was. She didn't expect things from him. She didn't want anything more than him. She had taught him how to truly live, not just merely exist. The way she made him feel was something he was unaccustomed to, but he was grateful for it. Until this moment. Because it was those feelings that were making this the most difficult thing he ever had to do. "I have to. You know I have to. You know why it has to be this way. After I leave, call them. Tell them where you are, tell them to come for you, and go with them. Don't try to come after me. Don't try to protect me. Knowing that you are safe is what is going to help me get through this. I will do everything I can to make it back to you. I love you more than life itself," he said. With those words, he kissed her with everything he had, trying to express the depths of his love for her. Then, even though it was the last thing he ever wanted to do, he pushed her away and ran out the door before she could stop him. As he ran out that door, he heard her scream his name, screaming for him to call back. In that moment, his heart broke into a million pieces, knowing that he caused her anguish. It took everything in him, every bit of his resolve to keep going and not turn around to go back to her. He knew he had to keep going, he knew that was possibly the last time he would ever see the woman who had become his everything.

_But if I should fall_

_Then you should move on_

_I'll always watch out for you, from up above_

She realized that he wasn't coming back, and her knees buckled as she let out a guttural wail. She was more devastated than she had ever been in her life. She had experienced tragedy and loss, but nothing compared to how she felt in this moment. She had hoped against hope that he would change his mind, but he hadn't and now she was left without him. She knew that she needed to follow his instructions, but she couldn't will herself to move from the place where she had fallen. She didn't want to go on, knowing that she may never see him again. But she had to. She knew exactly why he had done what he did, why he had left her. She felt abandoned, even though she knew that was not the case. She then thought on why he felt that he needed to leave, she knew that in his mind he was protecting what was his. And it didn't make her feel any better. But she knew what she had to do. She picked herself up and made her way over to make the call he asked her to make. She waited for someone to answer, and with two simple words she turned her whole world upside down. "It's me".


End file.
